Friday, May 29, 2009

May 28 Turning Japanese

Last week after Chrissy's knee reconstruction surgery, I met with the surgeon to get an update on the surgery. He told me everything went well and there was no cartilage damage, so it was good news all the way around. Then he showed me pictures of the inside of Chrissy's knee taken during the surgery. Just so you know, they didn't cut her open, the made small incisions and replaced the ACL using a camera that was inserted into her knee. The doctor was all professional and serious describing the pictures to me but I was mesmerized by the pictures. Not because of the images. But due to my very immature and abnormal brain. It was not paying attention to the doctor. My brain was playing the 1980's song by The Vapors, "Turning Japanese". Why you might ask? Because of a line in the song that came to me as soon as the surgeon showed me the pictures. So guess which line.
I've got your picture of me and you
You wrote "I love you" I wrote "me too"
I sit there staring and there's nothing else to do
Oh it's in color Your hair is brown
Your eyes are hazel And soft as clouds
I often kiss you when there's no one else around
I've got your picture, I've got your picture
I'd like a million of you all round my cell
I want a doctor to take your picture
So I can look at you from inside as well
You've got me turning up and turning down
And turning in and turning 'roundI'm turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
Turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
I'm turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
Turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so

I've got your picture, I've got your picture
I'd like a million of them all round my cell
I want the doctor to take a picture
So I can look at you from inside as well
You've got me turning up and turning down and turning in and turning 'round
I'm turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
Turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
I'm turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
Turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
No sex, no drugs, no wine, no women

No fun, no sin, no you, no wonder it's dark
Everyone around me is a total stranger
Everyone avoids me like a cyclone ranger
That's why I'm turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
Turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
I'm turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so
Turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so

Some may think I'm kidding about this but I'm not. This is the shit that goes on in my head. At least I have a song for those crucial moments in life. My wife has knee surgery and I'm singing a song about a masturbating stalker...what's so wrong about that.

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