Saturday, October 24, 2009

October 22 Dog Fancy Magazine

My mom usually calls or e-mails when she sends something to me. So I was surprised to find a manila envelope from her in the mailbox today. I was even more surprised to find the latest copy of Dog Fancy magazine with her address label on it. I knew why she sent it to me because of the Great Pyrenees cover story. The real question was why do my parents, who do not own a dog, subscribe to Dog Fancy magazine. The first thought that came to me was the movie, "Best In Show", which is a comedy about a collection of very strange dog lovers. My mom has told me that they go to the local dog beach often even though they don't own a dog. And I have asked if the police question them like they would a 40 year old man at the playground without children. So I flipped through the magazine, the puppies on the cover are beyond adorable, the article about Pyrs describes them perfectly. Then I come across the weirdest feature of this magazine, a centerfold. I am not lying. I started looking for it's likes and dislikes (likes long walks in the woods, running on the beach, flavored rawhides...dislikes traffic, fleas, fetching sticks) or maybe a favorite quote such as " I don't know how humans make it through the day without licking themselves down there" or "you really learn so much more by sniffing a butt than by shaking a hand". I still had to know why my mom subscribed to this magazine so I called her. Here's where the story gets strange. She had miles that were about to expire so she used them to subscribe to magazines. OK, nothing wrong with that. But they only offered niche magazines so now my extremely white, straight, non dog owning parents subscribe to Ebony, OUT and Dog Fancy. I tell her this puts you on the very popular mailing list of gay African American dog lovers. They should be getting some very interesting solicitations in the mail very soon.

1 comment:

  1. Funny shit. I just love your Mom.
    Auntie M